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Pamela Ewing in Dallas

Pam and Rebecca

Then something wonderful happened. Rebecca Wentworth called Pam and asked for a meeting. Rebecca broke down and confessed that, yes, indeed..she was Pammy's mother. To Pam, it meant a confirmation of her identity, which she badly needed. Rebecca arrived at a time when Pam needed family most, when she was trying to come to terms with her past, with her inability to have a child, with her problems fitting into the Ewing family. Rebecca came to cherish her daughter, and soon the past was behind them. They became extraordinarily close in a very short period of time.

Pamela Ewing, Rebecca and Cliff

The baby issue continued to haunt Pam, after the doctors had told her that she could not carry a child past the third month of pregnancy. Despite Bobby's and Rebecca's support, she floundered in depression, without quite being aware of what was happening. She started to drift off at work, her concentration gone, lapsing into short periods of remorse, of some kind of grieving. The depression culminated in near-fatal tragedy: Pam tried to kill herself by jumping off the top of Reunion Tower in downtown Dallas.

Bobby got there in time to stop her, but it was clear that Pam would try again and was in dire need of psychiatric help.

Bobby took her to Brooktree Psychiatric Hospital, where Dr. Dagmara Conrad began intensive therapy with Pam as an inpatient. Pam explained to her that being unable to bear a child made her feel "like nothing matters. Like I'm worthless, empty. Like I'm dying . . . or already dead."

She diagnosed Pam's depression as stemming largely from suppressed anger and elf-hatred. The therapy continued, and little by little Pam came to terms with her problem. As Dr. Danvers explained to Bobby, "Her desperate desire for a child is rooted in her own unhappy childhood. She wants to give a baby the love and attention she feels she missed. That way she thinks she can make things right for baby Pam."

A Sister and a Son

While still in Brooktree, Rebecca brought in Pamela's half sister , Katherine Wentworth, whom she had never met. She was a lovely girl and Pam took to her immediately. Katherine made Pam feel better, more secure; it was a nice feeling, having.more family, and even nicer to have a sister, which she had always wanted.On a surprise visit home to Southfork, Pam walked through the front door and saw Bobby standing there with the most precious little baby boy in his arms. Her heart skipped a beat. She assumed it was a child they could adopt. As she took the little fellow into her arms and looked into his eyes, she felt all the heaviness fall away from her heart. With this son to love and nurture, Pam's emotional recovery was complete within weeks.

In soaring spirits, Pam quickly settled into her life as Christopher's mother, while Bobby continued with the adoption proceedings. She was never happier than in those days, sharing the child with Rebecca, Ellie, Cliff all those who wanted to participate in her joy. When Liz Craig asked her about returning to The Store, Pam said no, explaining that she didn't want to leave her son. Bobby expressed a little concern about what he saw as obsessiveness with her mother role; he reminded her that she herself had always maintained how important working was to her. Pam sidestepped the issue. Then her husband surprised her with a gift of a business, Pam's Aerobics Unlimited, an exercise salon, complete with a day-care room where Christopher could happily be taken care of, right near his mama. Pam thrived, as did the salon. She had always been extraordinarily fit, and she proved to be a terrific instructor and example.

She and Bobby grew closer during this period. Though terribly overworked, and often exhausted, Bobby fought for time to spend with Pam and their son. Pam noticed that he seemed to be under some kind of emotional strain, which he consistently shrugged off when she asked him about it. In May of 1982 Bobby finally told her about Farraday, Kristin Shepard, and the fact that J.R. could be Christopher's father. Pam was shocked that Bobby had kept this news from her all this time, but she didn't hesitate to jump right in and fly to California with him to find out the truth, prepared to fight whoever she had to to keep her son.

The Ewing's formally adopted Christopher in the fall of 1982, and the little Ewing family seemed on good ground. But, alas, the calm was not to last. Pam's brother, Cliff, made a suicide attempt and it revived the Barnes Ewing feud. Now Rebecca was brought into it; she was hell-bent on revenge against J.R. in particular. And the contest between Bobby and J.R. for Ewing Oil compounded the stress. Pam saw that the corporate battle was changing her husband-he was becoming more like J.R. in his tactics-and she didn't like it one bit. As she said, "Power, money, and control mean nothing to me. I want a nice, ordinary life with my husband."

She wanted them to leave Southfork, to leave Texas if they had to, and start life over elsewhere. Bobby refused.


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